MAN ABOUT TOWN

The club I run every Thursday, Q + A, has its 11th birthday this week. Feel free to come for a visit, a drink and a boogie!

I found this at work while looking for an image of emo boys pashing for an article. No, really, I did!

This just in from the BDO publicists: " Store tickets for the MELBOURNE BIG DAY OUT have SOLD OUT in record time! This is unprecedented! Final tickets for the MELBOURNE BIG DAY OUT are only available through Ticketmaster ph 136 100 and www.bigdayout.com Be quick or you will miss out! Do believe the hype!

I just received this delightful, anonymous piece of vitriol in my inbox. Re: Your Bloggy Thing From: Anonymous Sender [anonymous@remailer.metacolo.com] Your Interests: Should have read: Just a past it, burned-out, tedious old queen who can't write for shit. Don't you love the way anonymity allows cowards to say whatever they like? I wonder if it's from someone I know? Assuming I do, it's clearly also from someone whose opinion I don't give a fuck about. LOL!

I've taken a couple of minutes to update my blog links, folks, so without further ado, please welcome: Blather Blog Sublime-ation Keep It Foolish A Wild Young Under-Whimsy Fluffy as a Cat Broken Left Leg And in the Gay Blogs section: The Pink Pen Stephen from Melbourne My Life in the Slow Lane Evol Kween Best Gay Blogs If I Bite You Hard Enough Click, read, enjoy!

For the first time in, well, ever, I'm actually looking forward to the new James Bond film, Casino Royale . The Guardian 's Peter Bradshaw has described the film as 'ridiculously enjoyable', and says that Daniel Craig is "a fantastic Bond, and all those whingers and nay-sayers out there in the blogosphere should hang their heads in shame... He's easily the best Bond since Sean Connery, and perhaps even - well, let's not get carried away. " By all accounts it's a grittier, grimmer take on the Bond franchise than has ever been seen before. That, coupled with the fact that Craig is bloody sexy (watch Love is the Devil if you don't believe me, in which he plays the rough trade lover of artist Francis Bacon) means that I'm actually enthused about seeing the film, which opens next Thursday. Me, I'm going to see it next Monday night at a media preview. I have a plus one for that screening. I wonder who I'll take...? By the way, if you...

Razzle Dazzle is a new Australian film opening next year, which I was lucky enough to catch last Wedbesday night at the Palace Films Christmas party (do some companies like to get in early, or what?) at the Westgarth Cinema. It’s a rare experience to walk into a cinema knowing absolutely nothing about the film you’re going to see. Razzle Dazzle , directed by Darren Ashton ( Thunderstruck ) is a mockumentary that bills itself as ‘a journey into dance.” It’s a bright, breezy comedy about the world of competitive dance eisteddfods, a sort of Strictly Ballroom about the under 18 set. The focus is firmly on the adults, including a single-minded stage mum played by Kerry Armstrong, and the rival directors of two dance academies, the well meaning but foolish Mr Jonathon (played by English actor Ben Miller) and the snide Miss Elizabeth (Jane Hall). While the humour never gets as black or as savage as I felt it needed to be to really make this film work, its gentle humour and PG rating sho...

Last night was 3RRR's 30th birthday party, held in the appropriately baroque surroundings of The Forum, and what a splendid affair it was. With the theme of 'Party like it's 1976', almost all the crowd made the effort to dress accordingly. There were some truly disturbing suits on display, some wonderfully garish frocks, an entire gang of Sharpies, several tennis players, footballers, superheroes, and sundry other 70's personalities. Myself, I donned a rather charming kaftan and a fetching wig, and proceeded to have an excellent time. So excellent in fact that the sun had well and truly risen by the time I got home... This afternoon has been spent curled up on the couch with a good book, James Ellroy's The Big Nowhere , and a quick visit to the local polling booth where I voted Green, having given up on Labor several years ago after their disgraceful response to the Tampa affair. Tonight's going to be a quiet one - just me, a bottle of red, and the ABC's...

Shock, horror! MEDIA RELEASE Wednesday, 22nd November 2006 Pagan Green Party Threatens Future Of Victoria The Rev Fred Nile, Leader of the Christian Democratic Party, has issued a warning to the voters of Victoria concerning the pagan Green Party. "The voters of Victoria only have to study the anti-Christian agenda of the pagan Green Party to know what will happen to Victoria if the Greens win the 'balance of power', the 'balance of blackmail' in the Victorian Upper House. In the NSW Upper House the pagan Green Party has strongly opposed the daily Opening Prayers of the NSW Parliament and have twice unsuccessfully moved Motions to have them removed (2001 and 2003) but were defeated both times, by 30 votes to 7 votes in 2003. The Greens strongly supported the Religious Vilification Bill that had draconian gaol sentences and have persecuted the two Victorian Christian Pastors, Daniel Scot and Danny Nalliah. The Greens have introduced a number of anti Chri...

Two parents decide to play a prank on their young son and his friend who have been watching horror movies. The result? Fucking hil ar ious! (Thanks to Evol Kween , who I stole this from.)

One of the great auteurs of modern American cinema is dead. The caustic and irreverent director of movies including M-A-S-H , Nashville and The Player died on Monday night US time, at the age of 81. There's a beautiful salute to him here , at Salon.com, which I urge you all to read.

So Ian Thorpe has retired. So what? Does that really justify the outpouring of grief, the wailing and moaning in the media? Anybody had think he'd bloody died or something!

Any suggestion that the Greens are preferencing the Liberals or Nationals anywhere in this weekend's Victorian election is entirely false. Despite anything that might be in the media, or in any garbled reports you may receive, the Greens are NOT recommending preferences to the Liberals (or Nationals) in any seats. We ARE recommending a preference to the ALP in the vast majority of the marginals that matter, and in most other seats. In some seats, we will leave it to the voters' choice, by providing a split or open ticket that allows them to Vote Green and then preference whichever major party they choose. In the Upper House we have already determined to provide all preferences to like-minded parties first, then Labor, then the Conservatives, then the candidates with the most extremely opposed position to The Greens. By contrast, the ALP has preferenced the so-called Country Alliance ahead of the Greens. This Party is essentially a Shooters-and-Loggers Party. Please visit our we...

Maybe it's because my so-called best friend (yes, I mean mean you , Andrew Plozza, formerly of Trafalgar East) threw a bucket of cowshit over me in front of a group of friends in 1983, when I was 15, to distance himself from Trafalgar High School's token poofter; but I've always been a trifle insecure... At the launch of the unauthorised biography of 3RRR tonight, I was constantly mentally pinching myself, reminding myself that I'm actually a part of such an amazing, integral part of Melbourne. I felt shy, awkward and out of place, so I did what I normally do in such circumstances: I got drunk, and I overcompensated for my nervousness. To quote Radiohead: "But I'm a creep I'm a weirdo What the hell am I doing here? I don't belong here I don't belong here ." The fact that apprently I actually do have a place at 3RRR makes me realise how incredibly fucking special the station is, in that it has a place for neurotic bastards like me. If you'r...

Last Wednesday saw the opening night of the Melbourne Theatre Company ’s final show for 2006, Tomfoolery . A musical review based upon the deliciously satirical works of American Tom Lehrer , the show strings together everything from standards such as ‘ Poisoning the Pigeons in the Parks ’ and ‘ The Masochism Tango ’ to songs the mathematician-turned-musician wrote for children’s educational television in the 1980’s. A framework of witty quotes based around Lehrer’s ability to send up seemingly every musical form in existence holds the show together. The cast of Rhonda Burchmore, Mitchell Butel, Gerry Connolly, Bert Labonte, Melissa Madden-Gray gave uneven performances, as well as the unfortunate impression that they weren’t quite ready to open. Words were forgotten, and cues missed. The lighting technician was also off his mark several times throughout the evening. All of this can be put down to opening night nerves, and is definitely not damning. It didn’t seem to faze the audien...

I've just had a very peculiar conversation at my local milk bar, which I'd gone to in order to drop off some dry cleaning (two dress shirts - one white with a wing collar, the other a black Gothic number - and a suit coat in case you were curious). As the tired-looking Vietnamese woman behind the counter was serving me, a younger woman was serving a bearded bloke in his mid 40's at the counter opposite. He had the gaunt, ruddy look of an alchoholic, and as she rang up his single purchase, he began talking, although not actually conducting a conversation with anyone save himself. Two plump children, sapped of energy by the heat, lay prone on the floor behind the counter. When the younger woman spoke to one of the kids in her own tonugue, her scruffy, bearded customer snarled, "Speak English!" Without thinking of the possible consequences , I snapped, "Why should she?" across the counter at him. He glared at me. I glared back. The two women behind the coun...

They caught me at an impressionable moment, the bastards. After three hours of radio, a voiceover production session for the National Gallery of Victoria, and a steak for lunch, I was waylaid and coerced into agreeing to appearing on TV - Channel 31 - at 8.15 in the goddamn morning tomorrow, after a late night of DJ'ing, to spruik 3RRR's 30th birthday shenannigans. God help me!

FAR FROM EVERAGE RICHARD WATTS shares a salacious word with the housewife superstar, Dame Edna Everage. ON DECEMBER 19 1955, a humble suburban housewife from Moonee Ponds made her first appearance on a Melbourne stage. Then known as Mrs Norm Everage, today she is one of Melbourne ’s most famous residents. Her trademark spectacles, her purple bouffant hair and spectacular yet tasteful costumes are recognised and celebrated around the globe. “I’m basically still a Melbourne housewife,” Dame Edna Everage trills. “I am. And I’m a realist. Women are . I think it’s because we bring children to the world. Or, in the case of Madonna, we import them.” This year she returns to Melbourne to celebrate her Golden Jubilee. “I couldn’t imagine life without stage shows,” Edna confesses. “People may think of me as a television person, or just as a legendary figure in Australian history, but I’m so much more than that.” Next month she appears in a new stage show at The Arts Centre, while s...

If you haven’t yet had the opportunity to visit the magnificent Eyes, Lies and Illusions exhibition at the Australian Centre for the Moving Image (ACMI) then you’re missing out on one of the best screen culture events of the year. I swung by Federation Square on Sunday afternoon, assuming that I’d be able to skim through the exhibition in half an hour before getting to another show at the National Gallery of Victoria. Instead, I spent an engrossing two hours in slack-jawed, wide-eyed wonder. Eyes, Lies and Illusions presents the pre-cinematic entertainments of the past, from the Renaissance to the Victorian era, in a seven-part exhibition drawn from the collection of German experimental film-faker, professor and curator Werner Nekes , via London ’s Hayward Gallery . Exploring the history of optical trickery, and a world of wonder that pre-dates the modern moving image, this collection of magic lanterns and magic mirrors, camera obscura and praxinoscopes is truly a marvellous sho...

A YOUNG LESBIAN who fled Uganda in 2004 after her father threatened to kill her faced deportation from the UK on Monday night. Faridah Kenyini was only 17 when she arrived in Britain . She settled in Newcastle , where she met her partner, security guard Sarah Garanette, 25. At an earlier asylum hearing, the judge implied that she was lying about being a lesbian and the danger she faced. Consequently, her plea for asylum was refused. An attempt to deport her last week failed because of an administrative error Garenette, Kenyini’s partner, has voluntarily offered to travel to Uganda with her following the registration of their civil partnership. Uganda ’s record of persecuting homosexuals is well documented. The country's president, Yoweri Museveni, once proposed the arrest of all homosexuals. He has also called for a return to days when “these few individuals were either ignored or speared by their parents.” Kenyini dreads returning to Uganda . “I am afraid that my r...

A FRESH, FRANK and life-affirming story about the search for love in post-September 11 New York , John Cameron Mitchell’s new film Shortbus generated an instant buzz when it premiered at the Cannes Film Festival this year. Critic James Rocchi said it left him “wanting to invent new adjectives - Fucktastic! Cocktacular! Breastalicious!” Industry bible Variety called it “ Unquestionably the most sexually graphic American narrative feature ever made outside the realm of the porn industry.” According to John Cameron Mitchell, sex has been cheapened by porn. In making Shortbus , he says, he wanted to use sex to show “the emotional lives of its characters.” “We had an open call for actors on the web. We avoided agents and stars, because they barely have sex in their own lives, let along in front of camera. We reached out to people who were interested in working with us for a very long time to create something new.” An intense period of improvisation followed, so that by the time the...

I've just read a glowing, touching, and powerful review that I wanted to share with you, of the stage adaptation of Holding the Man , Timothy Conigrave's acclaimed and devestating memoir about love and loss during the first, terrible years of the AIDS crisis. Written by the gay journalist, critic and novelist Stephen Dunne, it's a deft and beautiful piece of writing in its own right:- "It is easy to forget, to allow the memories of the relatively recent past to slide away to a possibly helpful distance. Australia's experience of HIV/AIDS in the 1980s and '90s is thus ancient history, and so much of that time is gone: a time of the dead and the dying; vigil shifts at ward 17; watching brilliant and beautiful men sliding into garbled dementia; polite efforts to avoid funeral scheduling conflicts; two full pages of obits in the Sydney Star Observer ; anger and love and screaming horror at the waste of so many lives. Surprisingly easy to let all that go. Tommy M...

Please excuse my lack of blogging in the past few days - I've been rather busy, what with homo history interviews, researching Australian underworld slang of the 1950's, getting absolutely hammered on Saturday night with Tim and Lefa and their friends, and viewing the absolutely excellent Eyes, Lies and Illusions exhibition at ACMI, which is jaw-droppingly good. A more detailed discussion of such events may or may not appear soon...

My guests were: Michele Lee, writer/director of a new black comedy, Kiss Me Where You Punch Me , at Glitch Bar & Cinema , North Fitzroy, November 17, 18, 22, 23, 24, 25 @ 7:30pm and November 26 @ 5pm. Emily McCulloch Childs , one of the co-editors of the new edition of McCulloch’s Encyclopedia of Australian Art . Legendary puppeteer Philippe Genty , who together with partner Mary Underwood has been working with students at the Victorian College of the Arts to create Landscapes Within . Patrick McCaughey, editor of a new book, Bert and Ned: The correspondence of Albert Tucker and Sidney Nolan . John Cameron Mitchell - a pre-recorded interview with the writer and director of the sexy, exhuberent , life-affirming emotional journey through post 9/11 New York, Shortbus . Another pre-recorded interview, this time live in the studio with the legendary Dame Edna Everage , promoting Ednafest . Kath Papas from Ausdance , and dancer Naree Vachananda, discussing Terrain: Multicultural...

I've just spent an hour or so updating my links, at right, to better reflect this blog's existance as a adjunct to my Triple R arts program, SmartArts . You'll now find links collected together under such headings as Visual Art, Cinema, Festivals and other categories, and undoubtedly I'll add to them sporadically as I go. Both the Visual Arts and Theatre categories include links to a couple of blogs dedicated to reviews and critique of current exhibitions and performances, so make sure you check them out while you're at it. At some stage I'll get around to updating my blog-roll as well, to include more of the blogs I read on a regular basis (although I should also get organised and subscribe to Bloglines, so that I know when you guys post updates instead of either obsessively checking several times a week or alternatively letting several days pass before I get a guilt attack and check in on what you've been up to!). Of course, instead of updating my links, I...

I played my interview with Dame Edna Everage on 3RRR today. It was delightful listening back to it, bursting into laughter at her quips all over again. I plan to write it up as an article shortly for MCV, so expect at least a partial transcript, coming soon...

I've been reading quite a bit of 'Young Adult fiction' in recent weeks, partially because of interviews I've done with authors such as Randa Abdel-Fattah on SmartArts , and partially because I've resurrected a couple of old ideas for a YA novel myself and fused them together into a new concept (but more of that later - I don't want to jinx any possible outcomes by discussing it too soon). The latest book I've finished reading is Metro , the 'difficult' second novel by Brisbane author Alasdair Duncan . Arguably Metro is adult fiction rather than YA, given Duncan's frank approach to his subject matter, but like Adam Ford 's debut novel Man Bites Do g , which covers similar ground, his exploration of post-adolescent/early 20-something life is written in a relatively simplistic way, sugesting it is more pitched at younger readers than those for whom the angst of their 20's is already comfortably (or even uncomfortably) removed. I met Duncan...

The sun is shining, the world hasn't ended, and the US mid-term elections have given Bush and the Republicans a slap in the face (hurrah!). Oh yeah, and Mercury transits the sun this morning: Transit of Mercury On the morning of Thursday 9th Mercury will pass directly in front of the Sun, appearing as a small black dot against the Sun’s bright surface. From Melbourne we will see all 5 hours of the transit. Sunrise 6:05am First Contact 6:12am Mercury first appears against the Sun Second Contact 6:14am Mercury is now a complete disc against the Sun Third Contact 11:09am Mercury starts to move off the Sun Fourth Contact 11:10am Mercury completely leaves the Sun The next Transit of Mercury to be visible from Australia won’t occur until 13 November 2032. Do not look directly at the Sun. Safe ways to look at this event include using a telescope correctly fitted with a solar filter or using a telescope projection method. Never look at the Sun through a ...

How to get over an unrequited love in four easy - and completely inappropriate - steps. 1. Discover that the object of your affection has a new Gaydar profile. 2. Spontaneously decide to invent a new Gaydar profile yourself without thinking through the consequences, message him, and end up having really hot cyber sex together because you know what turns him on. 3. Have him cotton on to who you are immediately thereafterwards, deny everything in a panic, burst into tears, and the next day write him a long apology in which you confess to having carried an unrequited passion for him around for ages, which you had tried but failed to sublimate into a friendship, and which boiled over earlier this year when he announced he was moving interstate. 4. Expect that he will never, ever want to see you or talk with you again. Or in other words, invade someone's privacy, betray their trust, behave like a complete cunt, and feel as miserable as all fuck for days afterwards while alternating cr...

When: Sunday 19 th November at 6 pm for a 7pm start Where: Upstairs at Dante’s, 150-156 Gertrude Street , Fitzroy, ph. 9417 2468. Items for auction: Exciting works by local artists, photographs, books and collectable art pieces made from rescued objects by Sea Shepherd crew plus surprise items. Opening the auction will be Sea Shepherd founder Captain Paul Watson, followed by a recent short film shot in Antarctica during the 2005 campaign. Auctioneer on the night is the fabulous Wes Snelling, with music provided by The ShoePhone Trio. For: Sea Shepherd Conservation Society, whose vessel the Farley Mowat is currently berthed at Melbourne Docklands, and has embarked on a campaign, Operation Leviathan , to raise funds for a newer, faster vessel to return with its mostly volunteer crew to Antarctica on December 1 st this year to defend 1000 whales from illegal slaughter in the Antarctic Whale Sanctuary.

Waaaaaay back in 1998, I had what I thought was the bright idea of writing a detective novel set in 1950's Fitzroy. By the end of 1999 I had a finished first draft of a book about murder, blackmail and football called The Murderer Wore Maroon . Over the intervening years I've slogged away at successive drafts, gradually refining and editing the manuscript until it was at the point where, a couple of years ago, I could show it to two publishers; one an independent, the other part of an international megacorp. They both made all the right noises, but basically told me what I already knew: my novel needed another draft to bring it up to scratch. By this stage I'd chopped the book down from its inital 147,000 words to a more manageable 112,000. I'd revised plot and character, researched the period, the setting, the mores and manners and vernacular of the day. There had been times when I felt the story was all over the place like a madwoman's custard, and other days whe...

In the words of its Irish-born director, Fergus Lineham, the “largest and most ambitious” program for the Sydney Festival to date was launched at the Famous Spiegeltent last Friday night. The festival, celebrating its 31 st year, is held in January at a range of venues across Sydney . “You’re probably wondering what these vacuous, shallow Sydneysiders are doing launching their festival here in intellectual Melbourne ,” Lineham joked in his opening remarks, before an invited audience of champagne-sipping arts workers and media (and very nice bubbly it was too). He went on to explain that a Sydney launch had been held the previous day. “Seeing as there are no sponsors or politicians present here today, we can dive right in,” the Dubliner said, and dive in he did, presenting a fascinating overview of the diverse events he has programmed into the 2007 line-up. Lineham’s second Sydney Festival strikes a careful balance between accessibility and high culture. For the serious c...

Cheers and thanks to: The most excellent Simon, who's become my dealer for all things Torchwood - I need another fix, maaaaaaaan *grins*; Dave Mack , who pointed me in the direction of www.sitemeter.com - I think I could gaze in awed delight at its map of the world for hours, if I didn't have episodes of Dr Who to watch, Cup Eve parties to visit and cider to down... And whoever it was who was using Gwynedd County Council in Wales as their ISP, because you were the last person to vist my blog, according to Sitemeter. Diolch!

Here's a charming story from Brisbane's Courier Mail to start your week, people. Gay student safety fear Vanessa De Groot November 03, 2006 11:00pm KEITH Phillips once told his teacher he would die for the right "to be himself". The Year 10 Alexandra Hills State High School student is openly gay and says Year 12 students have bullied and taunted him with verbal abuse. Yesterday Keith, 15, missed school because of a warning of possible violence. Keith's mother Trudy Lillicrap said the school had called her on Thursday night asking her to ensure Keith took the next day off because the school had received information his safety was under threat from a group of Year 12 students. Although unsure if he would return to school, Keith said he was willing to face the situation. "I'm not going to sit at home and hide . . ." he said. Ms Lillicrap said that she was worried the bo...

Seriously. From Fitzroy to Eltham on public transport on a Saturday night? Epic bloody public transport trip I'm telling ya. Well worth it though. I had a book, I had my tunes, and my destination was a splendid party thrown by the vivacious Bonnie Conquest , attended by some excellent blog-folk, including KP , TT and - the first time we'd met in the real world - Dave Mack (you, me, the Pink Flamingo at Meredith on Friday night, mate - say, midnight?). Fun times. Then of course, I ended the night at certain seedily salubrious inner city bars inhaling things I probably shouldn't and talking shit until dawn, but such is life. I blame the full moon. Or my parents. Or society. Possibly Andrew Bolt. Or something. *whistles nonchalantly*

Ok, so Tuesday's a public holiday, which means the MCV office is closed, which means we lose a day out of our production cycle, which means I have to go into the office on Friday afternoon, tired and nursing my traditional post-Q + A hangover, instead of being able to spend the day curled up on the couch. Stupid horses. Stupid short people in bright silks. Damn you all. Damn you all to hell!

Over the years, I'd heard this film - written and directed by Phillipe Mora and starring everyone from Barry Otto to Frank Thring and Barry Humphries - was bad, but my god, it staggers belief as to just how truly, unremittingly appalling it really is. It goes beyond the 'so bad it's good' category, and sinks into the quagmire of the truly painful. I gave up watching it after half an hour - has anyone actually watched this disasterous attempt at a horror movie from start to finish?